I'm not necessarily in the same situation. We seem to actually becoming out of this type of situation. I did all the lifting for 13 years. She came to me humbly asking for my forgiveness for her selfishness all those years and brought up a lot of reasons and acknowledged how hard I tried while she only said she was trying. How she didn't really try and how patient I've been with her and how she knew I could have left her or cheated, but didn't. After the tears (mostly mine) we started on a ver, very bumpy road. I do not trust her still and I almost think it's too little too late and that is what I need help with. I can see it tares her up that she caused our marriage to be passionless for so long for own selfcenteredness.
She sees how her own ideas of marriage were very warped and that marriage actually requires sexual intimacy, or why be married. She understands my resentment and doesn't try to get me to white wash it, but 13 F#$%ing years and the prime of my sexual years gone. I feel like such a fool for not walking out even when kids were present. I'll never get those back because I believed her every time she said, "I know I'll try", or "I know I'll change", or "I'll never say no again." and countless times I was rejected. It hurts so bad when the memmories come back. Even though we've had more sex in the last 6 months than in the last 13 years, I don't trust her and don't believe her anymore. I want to, but she has crushed and scattered my faith and hope in her.
