On being the best O'Dog I can be #2

[orangedog]

Couldn't handle work any more so went home early and curled up with the woofie. Now with kids so I have to be awake.

[orangedog]

I'll do some budgeting this week and figure out what's going on. Dia's post on thankfulness and examples such as "No more running out of gas before the child support check arrives" really hit home.

- I've never had to budget for myself in one house with two kids three days a week. I got close but failed to account for doctors, dentists, winter coats, etc.

- Cake Money this quarter I was planning on didn't happen. One freelance project fell thru after I insisted on cash instead of trade (imagine that!). Company lost money this half so no sharing paid out to anyone - first time for that. F!!!

- Big Island trip in March to do a triathlon with local club? Uh..not sure anymore. Money and upcoming foot surgery are two strikes against that one. I find out about surgery (if, when, what) this Friday.

[orangedog]

Today was better.

Had a brief but nice email exchange with the she.

Later, saw the she for a kid thing. It was a happy thing but when it was done I felt very sad.

[orangedog]

The O'dog is going to get his toe fixed (surgery) end of this month.

[robx]

Today was better.

Had a brief but nice email exchange with the she.

Later, saw the she for a kid thing. It was a happy thing but when it was done I felt very sad.

Why sad?
C'mon bro, details, it's ok.

[orangedog]

This might sound cheesy but the email exchange was about the was about the kid in the balloon. I for the most part don't email unless it's about a business matter but for some reason I sent one off, "Have you seen this?" She was watching cnn at a lunch place in another city on biz. So we exchanged a few back and forth and really felt sad and frightened for the small child (who wasn't) in the balloon. We have a child the same age.

Later that evening the youngest had a play date with the neighbors in the former neighborhood. The She was still in the other city. I visited with them for a half hour or so and on the way out the youngest said, "I want to see mama." "I don't think she's there" I replied, but there was a light on so he rang the bell anyway.

She had just got in. He bounced around on the front porch for a while. We made some small talk. She was wearing a favorite dress...


I think it was just sadness about old times. The house, the kid, the wife. etc.

[antlers]

Hey O'dog,

I know what you mean about old times, but I think the only purpose the past serves is to help us learn and make the present and the future more fruitful. Other than that, leave it alone.

I hope you're doin' OK. You've gone through all the proceedings that I'm just getting started on...gonna take months.

[Dia]

Hey, there, O'dog,

Let me know if you need any tips for saving money/budgeting. They're kinda boring, but they work.

Oh, and it was a margarita on the rocks, but a Pina Colada works in a pinch.

[orangedog]

Thanks Dia.

[Kettricken]

I'm drinking Manhattans. You know, for your file. Extra cherries.

My 2 cents ... Naturally, one doesn't wish to *wallow*, but neither do I think you need beat yourself up at all or feel "less than" for simple regret. You had some visuals and an interaction that put you in mind of times that were good, in your estimation. Y'know, welcome to humanity .... (wry grin). I see no rational percentage in trying to convince yourself out of such feelings. Let them be clouds, KWIM?