Slept with XH, help!!

[Augtan]

Thanks for all the responses. I know DB requires a lot of work, I did it for 2 years and he never left her and came home. I moved away, and really don't know what I want as far as getting back with him, one day I say "NO WAY", others I think if my real husband came back, I would take him back. But, I don't want this alien he has become at all. Yes, I do think he is waking up and seeing what is going on, what reality is, what he is missing by living 700 miles from his kids. What I do want more than anything else is for him to move here to be a Dad to his kids, and that won't happen with her in the picture at all.

This is just going to get more confusing...I WAS friends with OW's XH, they are going to court over their son, I wrote him an affidavid for the hearing, so yesterday I sent him an e-mail asking him if he got it and if they had gone to depositions. I told him that we had a good visit and got along, the kids had fun, etc. Then, I told him what my youngest had been saying about OW...nothing I have not told him before and nothing XH and OW don't already know. Well, her XH forwarded it to OW and she is having a hissy fit. XH told me to stop trying to break us up, I was so confused, I didn't send her the e-mail, I had nothing to do with it. And, like I said it is nothing she doesn't already know. I have never spoken to OW! I have no intentions, I have told XH that I love him unconditionally and because of that don't want to tell her anything or talk to her, text her, call her, etc. I have told him he needs to figure all this out himself. But, now he is throwing me under the bus for her again for something I didn't even do!! Yes, I want help, but more so to give my kids their Dad back, that is first and foremost. If after that, he proved to me he had changed, wants his family whole again, etc. then I would consider getting back together. I have done GAL, I live 700 miles away and am very active, busy person. I have spent countless hours trying to convince him he made a bad decision, for which he say "I don't know if I made the right decision or not, you need to let me process this and figure it out on my own." So, I am letting him do just that! But, when he was up here, we connected again, I could see it in his eyes, he just kept looking in my eyes and getting tears in his. It is a mess, I agree, I have no idea from one moment to the next what is going to happen. But, now she is jealous he spent time up here with his kids, and needs to cause drama to get attention. She is just sick, and really so is he!! I just plan to leave him alone, leave her alone, and keep doing GAL. Any other advice??

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