Is this the end of my marriage?

[P17]

Oh please. What, you think you're special? This happens all the time!

No I don't think I'm special. I'm actually glad it happens all the time. It means that my situation has happened exactly before and others can help. There is only so much reading I can do about this before my brain melts so I probably either read it and it didn't sink in or I haven't reached it yet. :-)

My wife told me she HATED me, told her OM that she would rather DIE that remain married to me, and she told her parents they needed "to just get over it."

The only difference between you and me is her parents, at least her mother seem to support her. But I suppose that's no biggie - as she always said, "you married me not my parents".

Right now, I'm looking across the sectional couch at her, and she's giving me a nice smile, after we just had a nice 45-minute talk about her work sitch. We exchange "ILYs" daily, and our sex life has never been better.

It CAN be done. And as Coach would say, "You can handle it."

I have no doubt I will handle it. I actually think I've done a pretty good job so far of keeping to together. Few tears, no breakdowns but just sad and upset (as you would expect). The only bit I'm not proud of is the clinging, the pleading and the neediness.

I remember reading about your story on the forums - 26 pages of comments from memory (or was that another one).

How easily did you do going dark / LRT though?

I've had a clear out today of some more of her stuff I found. There is also still mail coming in for her so there are constant reminders. All her pictures from the house are down and the wedding ring and chain she bought me is off just so I can try and get rid of these reminders. NC has been pretty easy so far (okay it's only been 4 days but I have no desire to contact her) but the thoughts and therefore my attitude will be the bits that give me away. Will try and focus on these over the weekend. Off for another bath and another read at DR for the section on Thought Stopping.

@Arwen_in_NJ I will take a look at that forum. Thanks.

@Sandi2 - I really really don't know if I want to be married to a person who could do this to me. What's more difficult is that I'm not even sure if I don't know or whether I'm just scared to admit it, give up, and move on. I need to do a bit of soul searching I think. What keeps me from giving up completely is that this woman who left is a mess and is a million miles away from the woman I knew just a few months ago. That makes me want to wait for her, but the old her not this new cold hearted creature. I can't see how somebody can change like that, permanently, overnight (almost).

Anyway, move on with my life and try to become the best man and dad I can be.