Yeah I guess that when you read all the books that say to go and do things you've wanted to do forever, like joining lessons for things, etc., it's harder to do when you simply can't afford it. I'm getting back into Mountain Biking, getting back into guitar and ready to start playing live again, etc. etc.
Its tough because as much as I really do feel that I'm doing what I'm doing for me, there's still that, "wouldn't it be nice if my best friend was to face some of her fears and become the woman that I know is in there somewhere, again?" that goes on, because even while GAL I am far from having stopped loving W.
Quote:
"You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be."
Awesome quote and one I'll have in my heart from now on! Thanks!
Quote:
You have had the guts to do what many betrayed men on this board need to do, but what few actually do.
I've been REALLY fortunate to have a few key, strong, wise people helping me. One in particular when I sat down with him after telling him my sob story with tears in my eyes (this was before W confirmed an SA and was even denying EA) said to me, "I'm sorry that you're going through a very difficult time right now, but if we're going to 'do this' there are three rules that need to be made clear: First, although you may have a different approach than me, I don't know how to do this if it doesn't come from a Spiritual place, so this needs to be a Spiritual thing for both of us. Second, this is about you, not about her. If she comes to me it'll be about her and not about you. If you both come to me, together, it'll be about both of you. Last - and I know this may sound cruel or harsh right now- but we cannot do this if you are going to consider yourself a victim. The problem with victims is that they are always victims and so long as there are problems, they remain a victim in it. Victims are at the mercy of others, sometimes called abusers, and not themselves. This brings us back to the second rule, and this is about you and how you can change yourself."
I only hope that I can someday have such wisdom to offer others in need.
