I could contact my partner see if she's available for Tuesday night.
I am pretty sure he's still not only in contact with her but there's still flirting going on. She's a scum bag and he's not much better.
Not sure how much longer I want to wait this out anymore. I'm just really sick of being lied to about that relationship and he won't cut it off because he needs it. Basically as I see it, his text message relationship is more important to him than his marriage or any possible relationship we might be able to have.
I guess like everything else, just going to ride this out and see what happens. In the meantime, acting as if and waiting until early November which is when we will reassess things between us.
So I have made some decisions. I am going to sell the house. We'll have to clear out the savings to do it since we are upside down on the house and his parents have offered to help with whatever we may fall short of.
H has been talking as if we do sell the house we'll save X amount and has said "Of course you would move in with me....I can't put you two out on the streets." So the start of the sentence was great, but then the tack on sort of sucked. But it's still pretty good, I think.
This will be a great thing for me I hope. It's a project to really throw myself into as I de-clutter the house. I brought home five boxes from work. Those boxes alone were used for the kitchen stuff! And I still needed to use grocery bags. So I hope to have the house on the market by the Sunday after next.
I also have some furniture to move and walls to paint, baseboards to clean and etc! Keeping the brain busy and working toward a common goal with H.
One reason to sell....I think H wants out of this house for many reasons starting with wanting to just move and possible bad feelings here. I want out of it because if we didn't make it, I don't want H thinking he can come and go out of my home. Here he does exactly that and really he does have the right to do so, now. And if we sell and make it, then even better.
So H bought me a new phone. With a new number. I was on my old one with a girlfriend. Dropped it and then I couldn't hear anything and no one could hear me. AND we just put my number on the for sale sign! Figures.
But he took me to the store to get the phone looked at....long story short, he's been asking me to get a new number because psycho ex-OW keeps phantom texting me and he knows it's her and he's worried I will give the phone to the police (whom I work with) to track down to see who's doing it because she denies it. Anyways, he was thrilled to get me a new phone with a new number. When the lady said I would need to get a new number to get the optimal deal, he just looked at me and smiled and shrugged his shoulders. Whatever.
I'm considering it. Believe me. The problem is I work with these guys and once it's proven it's her, then my dirty laundry comes out at work. And yes, they are professionals, but let's face it, there would be potential for snickers and I just really don't need that. But I am considering it because it's soooooo frustrating.
So I'm trying to be clear what it is I need as we work on this. Really he is doing somethings so that's good. But there's other things he does that really hurt, such as a big event last Saturday, he was in a dance contest and I wasn't allowed to go. That sucks and it turns out he didn't want me to go because ex-OW's boyfriend was there and he's told people we are separated. Then while he's there some girl meets him and starts posting on his facebook page, like she's sitting there watching it. So I've been posting too. Childish I know. (Don't bother with the 2x4's, I've already used one on myself.) The funny thing is that this girl is now answering my posts! Truth be told I'm probably just over sensitive right now.
I wish life could just be simple and sort of boring.
I have a job interview on the 27th. Could mean a lot more money and that's always good.
I have read your thread from the beginning and I hope this does not offend you because I think you are a very strong woman and I value your advice however, I have noticed that your H places a lot of value on what others think such as his parents or at the people at the dance contest. You do not seem like a person who cares about what people think of you, you are who you are. So, my point here is don't you realize that you are an AWESOME person and while I know you are trying to save your marriage you are the better person here. I think you already know that so I do not have to tell you. I just see a man who places a lot of emphasis on what others think of him instead of saying who cares what anyone thinks of me and my family. If he was secure with himself he would be able to do that...YOU, my friend, are that person..Sometimes I think you do not give yourself enough credit...
