I think a good idea might be to visualize your wife as something that can quickly cause you pain. When you and your W have a talk that starts to get heated/disrespctful or some sort of R talk imagine her as a stove. With each word that is said the burner gets hotter and hotter. Why would you want to touch a scorching hot burner and blister yourself? Logic tells us to NOT touch a hot burner to avoid both temporary and long term pain. Blisters from burns take a long time to heal and the healing process is painful. Your skin feels tight and hot and it limits your ability to function as your hand is not able to work as it should.
So, think of it that way. If you dont touch the burner you wont get burned. Instead, turn the burner off and avoid that blister that will hurt, take time to heal and limit your abilities to use your hand.
Nobody is telling you to ignore you feelings. Find a better outlet though instead of laying in to your W. Journal, blog or get it out here. Your current means of release are not appropriate or productive.
