I can’t give you what you need for a timeline. I can’t make any promises. That’s not fair to you or me. I’m not doing anything but working on myself right now. This is not all about you. It is about ME. There is no one else, no need for any of that. This is MY time. I am doing what I want when I want and how I want. I don’t have the time or patience to want or need someone else. I want to love myself, that’s all. Enough for today please."
DO NOT respond right now, wait. I promise this is healthy what she is saying. "Love your neighbor as yourself." She can't give away what she doesn't have. If you truly love her you will honor her request.
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like I am training for a match that will never happen.
You are already in the match and counting ceiling tiles.
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I need some goals
Become responsible for my own happiness.
Workout x times/week
Revisit hobbies
Read x books/month
Understand why I am so clingy, co-dependent, and smothering.
Make myself desirable.
etc........
Then plan the actions out to achieve them and measure them.
Notice they all are about you.
Coach, I wish you were here with me to help me get me through this. I look forward to your responses.
I did not respond to her email. Can you elaborate on how what she said is healthy? Healthy for her, healthy for me or healthy for our marriage? Doe what she say convince you that she is not looking or does not have another man?
I was a pretty damn good wrestler in my day and can say I was never pinned. 109-9 high school record. Not so successful in college. I don't want to think I am counting ceiling tiles yet. I am hoping that I have simply been taken down and now I am scrambling to get a reversal.
Sometimes I read these suggestions on GAL, like the ones you mention and they sound like they are ways to move on without her. Can you convince me that moving on without her will get her back?
