Absolutely LOVE what you told us!! thank you for sharing!!!I thought that was where you were -- off healing.
I have watched you detach and the thing that I see in your post that I see in my own life is when you said that ONLY GOD could heal your x. I am right there with you.
I am sorry for the continual pain of him playing "disney" dad.. and this time actually being able to really be that guy. I know you have worked hard to take care of your family and yourself.
Take care-- you are amazing.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I guess I cannot really answer that. I don't even think about that possibility consciously.
I have this dream though. Ex comes to his senses. He asks for forgiveness and apologizes to all the people he has hurt. He gets into counseling. Finds God. Works on being a husband and father. We date for 2 years. We do not live together. He asks me to marry him again. He takes the kids to Hawaii.(our favorite place) I take another plane and fly in 2 days later. We get married on the beach and surprise the kids.
What a dream hey? Fantasy?
That would be my ultimate happy ending. Only God knows.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Yeah, imagining being back with them is REALLY hard after all this. I feel like my exH and I are strangers now, even though we were together since we were 18. I sat down and ate with him and the kids at McDonalds about a month back and I cannot even look him in the eye for very long. Very awkward.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
I want to get married on the beach someday...to who? only God knows? But I will, I'm sure of it..
Last edited by Treese; 10/15/0905:07 PM.
Treese
H 49 M 45 D 23, D17, S12 M 25 T 31 01/07 OW H at my door w/proof Bomb ILYBINILWY 06/07 Sep 01/08 headed for the greener grass, Mar08.B#2H has child who is 9 11/08 pos.paternity
I think dreams are good. It helps us realize that life can be good after this crap. We have to look to our future and that may mean with or without our spouse.
Hoping for a brighter future is something we all hope to gain. Life is too short.
I wonder what these Ml'er dream of? Do they eventually lose all hope once they realize what they have done.....?
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I have this dream though. Ex comes to his senses. He asks for forgiveness and apologizes to all the people he has hurt. He gets into counseling. Finds God. Works on being a husband and father. We date for 2 years. We do not live together. He asks me to marry him again. He takes the kids to Hawaii.(our favorite place) I take another plane and fly in 2 days later. We get married on the beach and surprise the kids.
Sounds like my dream....
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
I think any fantasies I'd have in this regard are just fantasies
I too used to have 'happy ending' dreams. They used to comfort me but now they give me nightmares. For me I've decided that someone who has treated his own family in the way my XH has treated me and our 3 children has gone way past the possibility of any second chance.
I've definately changed and I really don't think XH would like the new me as he wouldn't be able to control me.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
hope is good.