Stuck before h left for the additional training year in state (300 mi away) and then again for the big move to the tundra, he came home and did massive amounts of yard work ("I"m Clearing the north 40!") and crazy house projects that we had discussed a YEAR or more earlier...suddenly he was in a frenzy. Seriously weird.
He seemed to feel proud of himself afterwards. I'm fairly sure he wanted thanks from ME...Yeah, I was not able to muster up a lot of gratitude at the time. Just thought you should know. I can't tell you what to do b/c I was too confused and angry (as if cleaning up was a big favor to me and showed him doing right by us??) but I think it happens more with women who feel they have to leave the place spotless so they feel needed when they return for visits or move back in, as it validates their worth. I don't know. Just throwing ideas out. At one point our s23 and h had a heated argument when h was demanding help with "the house projects" as if we had all voted on them and the timing... and besides, h was so critical and demanding and more or less ruining everyone's mood and dictating, that s23 said some things that weren't easy for h to hear. S23 was disrespectful in tone, BUT substantively, s23 was spot on...God that was so hard on all of us.
So glad we're past that now. (I know, "Never say never"...) None of this means anything permanent. But if you can hold your tongue from saying something negative, you'll have less to regret later. That's all I can advise you on at this point.
Good luck Stuck, and let's change that name soon too...
(( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
