So on Sunday I told my W that I was not going to accept the disrespect of her continuing to have sex with OM. I read DB, followed it pretty darned well, stopped the "more of the same," gave her freedom, didn't bring up the OM, etc., etc. I am going to give myself a lot of credit because, darn it, I deserve it. I've been incredibly strong through all of this. I told her, VERY calmly that her actions were not respectful of me or our marriage, and that I was not leaving her, but the situation. I've taken her photos out of my wallet, "hidden" her updates from my Facebook, and done what I can to be strong in myself and not ruminate on what she's doing. I'm trying to live for myself, GAL, and be as healthy and strong as I can.
Meanwhile I know that the manipulative OM is likely continuing to pursue her and mess with her head, etc. Is there any "art" or "technique" to going dark? Do I just GAL and that's it, leaving everything up to her? What tends to work for people? I am at peace with just about any outcome in which we're both safe and healthy, and to that extent, I guess I haven't totally let go yet. I just can't accept that someone who's been my best friend, soul mate, etc., might end up getting hurt badly by a man who's got nothing but his own sadistic (literally, OM is big into BDSM) pleasures in mind.
