Well, back to the grind after decent getaway weekend, even though the Pat's lost in OT.. Sigh.
I didn't think much about my sitch/life while away, and think I needed that.
I was happy to see d8 this AM though at least for a bit before I had to leave for work.
I did note, that although I got home late last night, I was extremely anxious about coming home, and wondering what WAW has been up to. This just seems to reinforce that I need to get away and out of the sitch as I can't stand being anxious about what someone else is doing.
Today, I got copies of all the filed paperwork from L, and lining up Apartment resources for my move this weekend.
Sad events on the whole, but I am moderately upbeat about moving and making these changes for me.
Picked up the book "Crazy Time" on someone's recommendation, but no idea when I'll have time to read it given all the stuff that is going on.
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
Keep your head up. Things may not look like what you want right now but both those things and you can change for the better. Keep busy, keep improving you and you mind and let the rest take care of itself.
Hey, I just want to say that I'm sorry things ended going the way they did for you over the past few months. I'm new and yesterday I read through every page of your thread. I fear that I'm in about the sitch you were 6 months ago, but I'm hopeful just as you were. You really seem to have gone through a metamorphasis in the past few months and I'm sure you'll continue to grow. I only hope I can do the same.
Me: 30 W: 29 D: 20 months M: 5 years T: 6.5 years ILYBNILWY and want to separate: 10/5/2009
Thanks for your thoughts, I have not seen WAW in days now, nor talked to her, and I have not missed it as much as I thought I would..
I am sure that once I am moved, and things settle down to routine, I am going to have lots to miss, but my focus still is on changing and improving me, and that has my attention now more than impending D, as I need to be better person for d8, and hopefully anyone new in my life.
NGL,
I still hope that the 'new' person in my life may be my WAW in new form someday, but will accept that is probably not likely.
I have to get some time to go read your sitch, but you CAN change you just have to decide you will.
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
This is tough to take, but came home tonight and WAW is out drinking with work buddies.
I can't stay around here any longer with these types of things happening on a regular basis now. She has floated on my finances the whole time here as well, so why would she do anything to move along for herself?
I am angry and sad and lonely all at the same time.
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
I know how you feel. Things will get better and this too shall pass. In the end, I have no doubt that something good will come out of our sitches for the both of us. Definitely sounds like it's time for you to leave town. Keep us posted once you get set up in your new digs.
I'll check in with you later. Take care.
M: 41 W: 39 S: 11 S: 10 D: 4 1st contact w/OM: 1/19/09 EA began: 2/14/09 EA discovered: 3/1/09 I file for D 8/25/09 to protect myself _______________________________
Well, this will be my last night in my home. There is nothing left here that is mine though, that has been moved to my new apartment.
Strange that I am not as sad as I thought I would be tonight.
I wrote my wife a farewell note, and what she will be responsible for, and that I will love her still, but that I decided I could no longer live with her.
Who knows what the next chapters will bring in my life. It appears to be a blank canvas right now. I hope that my wife finds the happiness she deserves, and that so do I..
So tomorrow, October 19th, will mark the day in my sitch, that the LBS completes the transition to the WAS.
Last edited by iwantittowork; 10/19/0902:12 AM.
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
