It's been a while since I've talked to you. Thank you for the encouragement with my stich.
I've been doing a lot of research about my how my wife acts. There's a psychological condition called passive/aggressive. What I gather from my research it's a silent hatred which she has no control over. All these years of the silent treatment and lack of a physical relationship points toward this condition.
She has been punishing me for her lack of communication skills. And a few days ago she bursted out in anger when I confronted her behavior. She does what she wants and doesn't give a definate answer if I ask her for anything.
New Plan:
1)Start journalling her moods. Find a pattern and use as a opportunity for her to vent.
2)Don't let her get away with a maybe or I guess. Either yes or no if it's anything else take it as a no. Example: ME: Would you like to join me for a drink. Wife: Well, maybe if I get this done or that done or blah...blah..blah... ME: Okay then I'll go by myself.
3)Go back to the marriage councelor for me.
4) If she's moody ask what's wrong. If she says nothing then ask if everything is okay. Get her to say yes or no. If she says she's okay then the ownership of her unhappiness falls on her not on me. If she has a problem then it's time for me to listen.
5) There maybe more steps but this one I hope I don't have to use, unless she continues to be stubborn. What I read is a passive/aggressive personality in a relationship gets worse as the years go on. If I want a loving realationship then I'll have to get a divorce.
I'm praying that I don't have to resort to #5. It seems the more I look into this problem, the slimmer the chance things will progressively get better.
