I am sorry to hear about your situation. From the sounds of it, you need to focus on yourself. As hard as it is, you need to keep yourself as busy as possible. When my situation happened, it was overwhelming at first. A few months down the road it is still very difficult, but I can at least focus on other things. My guess is that right now it's all you can think about. You will get through this! There is a community here to support you and you have found it early, which is good.
M30,W40,SD10,D7,S6-T9,M7 Sep 6/09 7/09 - "Moving on with my life, you should too" My Story