I don't see the point in that either. I told C as much - she's said what she wants. Bringing up a R discussion will just result in that again. I honestly think that C sees the healthiest step for me is to move on.
I guess I'm having trouble distinguishing baby-steps from cake-eating. I was in bed reading last night when she got home, to some degree because I didn't want to be "waiting for her..." When she got home, she came in - I guess she needed something out of the bathroom - and she lay down with me for a moment, then kissed me on the cheek before she went to bed.
I left her a message yesterday, and she called back and left me a message about how her day was going. Last night she thanked me for calling her, saying it was nice to hear from me during the day.
Are these baby-steps, or cake-eating?
I asked her this morning about dialoguing and the Retro post-sessions, but it seemed like pressuring her.
One of the Retro couples emailed me, and is asking if she can call / email, talk to W. I don't know if that's a good idea - again, pressuring her to work on the marriage. I suppose I'll mention it to her - I don't know about that one though.
Karen, thank you for the input - I'll full admit my head isn't straight on this. Well, I'm going out tonight to the divorce-care meeting, and W has a high-school reunion this weekend - leaving Thursday. So, we're not going to really see each other for a number of days. If not by design, I'll have some time to just be.
Just as an aside, I'm amazed at how I can go from feeling out-of-my-mind to normal in a couple of hours. I'm afraid that, again, it's the Xanex. I'm really frustrated with myself that I continue to be messed up. I'm looking forward to getting better.
