Is this the end of my marriage?

[P17]

P17, I haven't been on your side of the fense, but I know how hard some things are when you are being mistreated and you want your family & friends to know the truth. From what you've said, most of them already know what is going on and that is why they are encouraging you to D her. I want you to read the book first, and read some more on the board. There are a couple of threads here on the board about people's opinions of exposure, so that might give you a better handle on it. If her OM has moved into the house with her, I don't see where that would be very secretive and it seems that it would be public knowledge at some point. At any rate, try to rest your mind & emotions some and make sure you are stable before you do anything.

I will check the threads out and see what people have said. The books arrived about 10 minutes ago so I will start to read them tonight.

If you daughter is needing to spend time with your W, then that proves you have that R to consider. Your D is old enough that she should be able to put two & two together and see what your W is doing and that that is wrong. I'm sure she feels a lot of pain from your W leaving her. I just can't understand why your FIL would buy a house that close to you unless he was thinkng it would be instrumental in getting the two of you back together. Does he not know about the OM? That is pouring salt in the wound everytime you have to look that direction and see her house. I don't think that would be a good environment to think about continuing living there in the future. Maybe things will change and you won't have to deal with that part of it for a long period of time.

My FIL did buy the house there and he was hoping that it would give both of us the space we needed to work things out. He didn't know about the OM (as none of us did at the time) and when I found out and told my MIL she said I was reading too much into it and they were only friends. She now supports my W in what she is doing as she has done it twice herself. In fact her comment about adultery that my wife passed on was 'you haven't committed adultery, yet'. That just said it all to me.

I think my FIL wouldn't be best pleased when he hears about the way he has been completely conned. Then again they all seem to blame me one way or another anyway.

It is rubbing salt into the wound. I can't actually think of a worse thing for her to do to be honest. I am thinking about moving from here. Unfortunately if I do it will be back to where I came from which is 300 miles away which will mean giving up the time I have with my daughter and also giving up any chance of reconciliation with my wife as I would only be here 4 days per month. Part of me also thinks why I should move and not her.

You know something that has been bothering me, and maybe some other people can help out. When my wife told me it was over I took my wedding ring off. I briefly wore it around my neck but it's not in a drawer. I'm wondering whether I should put it back on or not ... I'm not sure why. I just have an urge to wear it and be proud of my M.