Newbie (again)

[dday101798]

Well, there in lies the problem in my opinion. I need those old wounds. They remind me of who I bacame, what I've endured, who not not to become and most importantly, how what I do effects my kids. What I don't need is the vile venom injected in them by a person whom I entrusted my everything to. A person who took that everything away and cursed me the same horrid things done by the last two people whom I've completely x'd out of my life since I was so non-desireable to theirs. I just want her out of my head, but that can't possibly happen. It's just all so confusing. Worst of all, I'm spending money on this that I don't have, so something better become of it.