... I very much took a consistent approach to him. Early on a poster told me somethning different to everyone else (I thikn it was Appleroad).. she said, men in MLC or depression are different to those that left because of an A at work, you need to do a more tailored DBing and not follow it.. you have to treat them with full love and ACCEPTANCE and be consistent.. always be there, dont reject any contact from them at all, or turn down invitations (which Jody advised me to). I never did, never once. It seems that was very important to him, that he knew I was still there for him.
Ali, thank you SO much for all of this feedback. I will go back and read this many times. There is a lot of info here. On first read the big thing that caught my eye was the quote above. At this point I'm wondering if I should be initiating e-mails more (I have backed off a bit since the 1 year anniversary of the bomb 4 weeks ago, waiting for him to initiate) or should I just respond to e-mails that H initiates. I'll look for your reply. I took MIL to the dog park 1 week ago and he e-mailed me last night that even though she has Alzheimers Disease, she has been talking about how much she enjoyed the dog park and how she was kissed by a dog (he stuck his sandy little tongue in her mouth --- it was pretty funny!)
