A Little Epiphany - (and a newbie delurking)

[Dia]

Hey, Wifey? How do the two of you handle holidays? Is your H welcome at extended-family get-togethers on your mother's side?

I'm guessing that since I'm 'not part of the family' that I will not be welcome for Christmas or Thanksgiving at H's FOO compound. H is welcome at my family's place, but for reasons having nothing to do with our M, I've already decided that we'll get a hotel for any time we spend with my family over the hols.

I'm ok with being persona-non-grata, actually, and it's a bit odd to me that I am. I've learned some hard, strong lessons in detachment over the past two years. MIL is entitled to her feelings and opinions just as much as I'm entitled to think she's batchit crazy for having them. In fact, I can even understand why she feels that way. And being detached and not pursing her is DBing my MIL.