We met with one of the couples immediately after the weekend and talked through our experience. They did a good job talking to her and I think that is the main reason we are going to the first follow-up session next Sunday.
I wasn't blameless for the weekend results. I certainly reacted to her and played into the overall dynamic. With practice, I would have ignored her written accusations and just focused the verbal discussions on the emotions. I didn't however - I dove right in to discussing the issues during the verbals.
The one benefit that I think we are going to take out of it is we finally (at the end of the weekend) learned how to dialog without problem solving (talk about the emotions themselves, WITHOUT any discussion AT ALL of the issue.) I am not sure if we are going to be able to take advantage of it. Although I agreed to do the daily dialoging exercises, I think that she will avoid doing that sort of exercise unless someone is enforcing it. I don't want to be in the role of enforcer, as that just throws her back into the role of rebellious teenager.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
