Thanks Being Me! Myself, STBX and the kids celebrated yesterday at my Mom and Dad's place. It was a lovely day and evening. Btw, October 15 is the anniversary of our separation, year 3 is beginning. Do you buy her a card for such occassions? Now, I have a question for any Dbers who want to chip in. How do you handle when your Pastors are seemingly insensitive to your personal situation? I met with our Lead Pastor six weeks ago to discuss my best friends marital separation and spent two hours talking and crying. I so appreciated his time and caring. Since then he hasn't followed up in any way such as "how's your friend" or "how are you doing these days" etc. Not a word and there has been ample opportunity. I also sent him an email afterwards thanking him and updating him on my personal sitch. I got no reply. Last week I sent our Assoc. Pastor a poem I had written about lonliness but didn't want to send to any of my best friends as they are both quite a mess these days! I have a good R with this Pastor or I wouldn't have sent it. Once more, I got no reply. It kind of hurts when you're trying to trust those who you are supposed to trust and they don't respond. I know Pastors are busy people and I don't envy them their job but...all it would take is a "thanks for sharing" or some short response like that. There's a part of me that's saying "find another church"! I have had issues with emails and our Pastors previously, sometimes they reply and sometimes not and sometimes it's something important they aren't responding to! I usually just try to put it aside and say "busy people", "it's not personal" but now I'm going through a difficult period and it seems like no one is particularly interested in doing the small things which would mean alot to me. I've been told by a friend I should make an appointment with each of them and talk to them but how do you say "Hey, would it kill ya to reply to my email?" It feels like I'd be begging for crumbs and I don't like that feeling!!! . Trust is not an easy thing for me, considering I was betrayed by a wife who I trusted implicitly. I don't even trust God entirely, which I told my Pastor when we met. Aren't there some things that should be obvious to anyone? When someone shares a difficult personal situation, don't you check in with them even once to say "how are you doing?" and let them know they matter. If someone sends you an emotional poem he has written don't you say "thanks for sharing" even if it stinks . Am I way off base here? Am I overly sensitive? I'm seeing a pattern here that I don't like much. Anyway, all thoughts would be appreciated. I'm not sure where to go with this but I'm not a happy church goer lately!
Just to add, I have also been open about asking for prayer for myself and my friend at prayer group which our Pastors attend, so it's not like my situation is some kind of secret. Come to think of it, no one in my church has ever asked about my friend or how I'm doing in regards to my struggles with supporting him! Hmm, where's that good old Christian love? I ask others about their sitches...OK, I'm done whining!
