Teenagers benefit from parents not talking to each other and having the same information. They can hide in the cracks.
Maybe somebody here has some better input as to how it works for them (it took my H and I over a year to start weekly phone calls re: kids). I keep it simple, but I do tell him the cool stuff too (parental pride).
I know that you are in a different place than I am, so how about talking to a C or DB coach about it.
Communicating through the kids works as long as they want the other one to know.
