I don't know that it was so much of a boundary I needed to set that I just needed him to know (not sure why, just for me I guess) that through all of this I have NOT been taking a stupid pill every morning and that I do notice things (though I tend to ignore now).
BUT I will say that it did lead to a conversation which gave me a very up close and personal look into how much pain he is in, which is a good thing. I don't mean the pain is a good thing but the fact that I was reminded of it and I was able to be compassionate again. I did express that because as detached as I am trying to be, I do still want him to know that I care.
He hadn't opened up at all to me for awhile about what is going on in his head and was hiding the pain okay, so it seemed.
I have gone through phases. I have always spouted when I was upset. Then he didn't seem to care at all or it gave him fodder for how evil I was so I stopped altogether. Now he has started noticing again most of the time when something seems "off" with me and has been asking. I wasn't telling him anything really, just trying to work through things on my own but now I am picking and choosing and letting him in a bit.
I don't know. It all seems like such a game sometimes.
Mach, you are right. I think it is all about the way we handle things differently to show how we have changed with a live-in. I can remember a couple of times from weeks ago where I reacted totally differently than I would have normally(laughing something off instead of getting irritated) and the look on his face was priceless!
