I hope he understands that, given her ability to apparently hold a personal grudge in the face of the fact that her son is reconciling with the mother of his child .... if it wasn't you, sooner or later OW would do something to piss her off and get exactly the same treatment. This kind of reaction -- eviction, disinheriting -- is something I *might* expect if you were a full-blown abusive psycho bitch from hell. For it to happen under any other circumstances smacks of serious dysfunction and control issues on *her* end.
There is a lot getting thrown at him at once. But ultimately, if he can't deliver the message, "We're reconciled. Deal with it", you have great big problems remaining. However, there's nothing that says you have to insist he handle it any certain way at this exact moment.
Do you feel comfortable letting him call the tune on how you interface with his mother right now?
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
