But, he did just invite me to go to a party with him tonight with a group of 'buddies'. H hasn't told me when this annual party is for the last 5 years.
H is still doing paperwork for taxes, the extension we filed is coming due now. He promised to have it done by the end of this week but it won't be. I asked again last night, I am so ticked about it! I told H I couldn't stay and talk with him because I was so irritated I wouldn't stay in control. I went to bed.
After a few minutes he came to the doorway and talked and talked about his day and things he wanted to share. So why not just come to bed and talk with me like we used to do? Why stay at the door and keep the distance? I feel like he still feels a wall up from me and maybe there is. I don't know how to NOT keep up some level of detachment and protection of my heart and my emotions. Am I keeping H from reaching me or is he just taking his time to finish baking or is this all still a mean trick? Idunno.
Cold and frosty this morning. I gotta head out to cover chores for H this morning. I hope the hoses didn't freeze!
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
