I pick up D this afternoon for my weekend. X always greets at the door and hands off D to me. She is going out of town through Monday and tells me I can have D longer through to Monday instead of usual Sunday. She wanted me to take off on Monday, but I have work and can't just take off. X's mom watches D during the day and should have no problem watching her on Monday too.
I guess I don't really trust what she does and what her alterior motives are. Hate to make life to much easy for her in all of this. But I do want to spend more time with my D, but can't do it at the expense of my work.
When I have to be around the X, it makes me so sad. Hurts my heart when I leave there. I want to work through all of this and it is going to be difficult on my D the longer we go through this. I do still care about my X a lot. Wish she could get beyond this stuff.
What do I do? Do you ever get over the feelings when you see them? Should you not want to get along and want to be together for the R purposes and D best interest?
It would be so much easier if u did not care. Does she care? Do she still have feelings for you? What is she thinking and will she ever be able to be more mature about all of this? Will we have to go through a lifetime of this? How long do I try to work it out with the X? What if I meet someone else? Should I still give priority to the x? OMG.. so many questions..
