Newcomer, want to keep my hope alive!

[BigJohn]

Actually, what I SHOULD have written was, he is going to be filing quickly, just waiting for a couple days as I need to pull some assets from retirement so I can get setup in new place, and once he files, my assets will be frozen. What he will be waiting on is the summons, he is going to wait until after the weekend I move out, to ensure that I am ahead of my WAW legally, and that is mostly at my direction, not his.

IWITW,

OK, this sounds much better. And I do understand your concern about the automatic restraining orders that come down once you file for D. The only thing I would add is that if you don't have a living trust currently in place and have the time to do so, now might not be a bad time to do that if you can. That was one thing I wasn't able to complete before I had to file.

My WAW is waiting for me to set the next mediation appointment, and given her total lack of motivation to do anything in this sitch, I don't see any signs of her moving to get her own L to try to file first.

I understand- my W is the same way... right now. Just don't make the mistake of allowing your W's current attitude to lull you into complacency. Stay "frosty" and on top of stuff.

This is also mostly me, at this point. We send my d8 to private school, and my WAW works at that school, and gets a benefit of lower tuition for doing so. My d8 does very well at this school, and I know that it is in her best interest to stay there, since I will be moving 1 hour away, it just does not make sense to fight this and tear my d8's world even more apart.

Then your current custody arrangement would seem to be best for D8.

However, I know that in the future, if my WAW crashes, or d8 starts to suffer at WAW's home, or anything of the sort, then I WILL fight to get custody. I am ok with that at this time, we will see what will happen of the next few years. I have very clear thoughts on that it may come to pass that I will have to fight legally in the future on this.

Precisely my point in taking ownership now of things like counseling issues for D8. Besides being the right thing to do for D8 now, you are establishing a foundation from which to challenge your W in the future. What you don't want is to be a Johnny-come-lately type if and when the crap hits the fan in the future with your W.

I have resolved that finances are secondary to my and d8's emotional security, and I know no matter what happens financially, I'll rebuild myself at some point in the future, as I always have when faced with financial hardships.

I'm feeling the same way in my sitch. Sounds like you are doing better. Hang in there.