Yeah i did nothing i was supposed to do. I started to, but it was too much. Too much to hold in. Too much to bite my tongue at.
I let it go...and i let it go good. I told my W that because of her indiscretion i had lost trust. That every time she is out, i feel she was out with him or thinking about him...blah blah blah.
I literally called her a quitter. I told her I hated her straight to her face. For making me feel like a looser. For making me feel like a pathetic man that grovels at the foot she extends. I told her i hated how easily she gave up on trying. Everything....i let everything out. I mean everything.
And you know what? I feel amazing!! I feel like a giant monkey has been lifted off me.
As I was outside cooling off, my wife came down from the MC office and her presence soothed me.
WE went to her car and we sat and talked for like 3 hours. Her telling me it was over and blah blah blah, me telling her that i felt i was going crazy. LIke institution crazy. More talk. More of the same and then bam....i asked her what was working before and she told me that she noticed little baby steps and GET THIS...THAT SHE WAS FALLING IN LOVE WITH ME AGAIN, UNTIL THE SNOOPING INCIDENT. Can you believe that? Can you effing believe that?
I am so mad. I told her that I snooped on her that 1 time and that 1 time only. If knew that nothing was going on, why would i be so untrusting of her going out. She paused and looked at me as if she just realized she was throwing knives at the wrong back. She said, i suppose that is one way to look at it.
BINGO...THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR FINALLY SEEING THAT I HAVE NOT BEEN SNOOPING ON YOU THIS WHOLE TIME!!!!!!!!
