Thanks Puppy as always you get it! I think that your suggestion that I offer him total transparency and access to my accounts is a good idea.
It's weird that now he's checking up on me. I guess the GALing got to him. You're right - he says he understands how I felt about everything but I don't think he really does. Or else he seems to only understand when he knows he's put both of us in an uncomfortable position (the last few major events with the friend).
You're also right that I've got to quit driving myself crazy. I either have to trust and move on or I'll drive myself nuts. But I also think I need to do a better job of expressing what I need from him to move on. He may not be able to give it to me but at least I'll have expressed it and that will allow me to let go and move on. More work to do in my IC.
I also think it would be easier if he'd go to MC with me. So you're also right that I have to decide what I can live with.
