Ups and Downs

[Energizer Bunny]

Validating is good. I've given W flowers and gifts during this and it turned out to be weird.

Validating is always good though.

Good luck with MC. My W won't even try that anymore. She has just decided that we weren't "meant" to work it out.

yet she's still here.

[tristan]

I am dreading the MC today. I have a plan today. I am going to act as if at the MC...I am not going to say a peep....and just validate. I will have a sunflower waiting for her at the end of the session.

I hope it goes well.

My W always seemed to think the worst of our relationship at MC sessions. We would be great a few days before it and I would feel her pull away as the session grew nearer. She would think the M was horrible in the session. Afterward, we would grow closer. This cycle seemed to continue week after week. Has anyone else run into this patterns with MC sessions?

Just wondering.

[Energizer Bunny]

Yep. Back when we were going my W always pulled away before MC appts too.

[Energizer Bunny]

W just called me at work. She keeps using S as a reason to call. She told me one of our neighbors stopped by today and had coffee with her. W said the neighbor wanted to check and see how things were going.

I had to fight so hard not to ask..."well, how are things going?"

W has initiated contact with me every day this week. Something's still off. No talk of the condo though. She did mention that she is working at an event this weekend for her GF's kid though. An event that is meant for the parents of the kids..not the friends of the moms of the kids. To steal from Hope4luv...grrrrrrr...

[undrdg]

Interesting.
She might be looking for a friend to hear her out or she might be looking for some stability. I am not sure.
Good job biting your tongue.

[Butterfly1]

How ya doing this weekend?

[Energizer Bunny]

How ya doing this weekend?

I'm pretty detached. Keeping busy.

W had pulled back a lot. I asked her what was going on with her and she told me she's spending some time focusing inward. She doesn't seem to get how her ups and downs affect me.

I was very loving in telling her that I am sorry that she is in this place.

Now I'm getting thoughts of "I deserve better than this." I really haven't been focusing on "us" as much this weekend as usual though.

Just a little more detached.

I checked in over at your thread. Keep up the GALing!

[Dia]

You're doing fine, EB. Hang in there.

[Butterfly1]

I'm with you on "I deserve better than this" thinking. Probably true. Good idea to hold those as goals!

[Energizer Bunny]

This week is the 1 year anniversary of the big bomb. It's I had said for a long time that a year would be my breaking point. It would be my limit.

Just a week and a half ago we were sleeping in the same bed, hugging and kissing again for a couple of days. Major pullback is here, but still there isn't the anger and distance that there used to be. It seems like we're roommates again.

I wonder how she can sit in the other room, sleep in "her" room, etc and never have the "I miss him, I want to go be with him moments." I wish we could just be open with what is going on.

I'm at a funny place with all of this. Still pretty detached feeling. I want to ask her when she is planning to go. I can't go on like this forever. I really do think that I'm a good catch for someone. It's just too bad that she doesn't think that it's for her.