BBJ: I think when my brother died, I realized life is so short. At that point, I had spend a year and a half trying to do whatever I needed to so that stbx and I could maybe work through this mess.
I think it finally sunk in that he didn't want to work it out. But there has been so much I have learned from it that, as painful as it was, I don't think I would change the experience. It changed me, for the better. I know what to look for. I know that I am capable of great, unconditional love. And I know how I want to be treated, and how I would like to treat someone else. I am more compassionate, slower to judge, and understanding of people who want to hang in there.
I think although we all are going through this, and some of us will reconcile and some won't, ultimately it is what you take from the experience. When I first came to this board a year and a half ago, I was a mess. I had no idea of what I was doing. Now, I do.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
