First Piecing Thread

[Hope4us]

Hey guys. Thought I'd throw out an update. Haven't had ANY time to get on as work has been crazy busy, but I'm not complaining.

Things at home are still good, but I find myself in a weird place. Like things are going good, so what's going to go wrong.

I'm still getting "I love you's" on a regular basis. We ML on a regular basis and W has even gone outside her comfort zone a couple times, re: sexy text messages, things like that.

But it all still makes me nervous. I don't know. Nothing she's done, but stupid little things. Like the other day we had lunch together and a guy from her office was in the same sub shop and W waved to him when he walked out. Not a big deal, right? But this morning I had a nasty dream about W and this guy and it's been bugging me all day.

Sometimes I just wonder if W really gets it. We were watching the news last night and they were talking about Letterman's confession and when he said "when you've hurt someone you love like I have.....I have a lot of work to do", W didn't say anything. I don't know if I was expecting her to say "I'm sorry" again and tell me she'll do whatever I need her to do to heal or what, but it's just things like that that have been bugging me.

And a week ago we were out for dinner and the John Edwards thing came up where some emails came out that he told his Affair partner that she just needed to wait until his wife died and then they'd be together and I think W understands just how messed up A's are, but when we started to discuss a bit she said "can we just not talk about this?"

Again, talking about those things are what I need, to heal, to understand, to KNOW she gets it, but she still avoids. Because if I don't truly KNOW she gets it and understands just what her betrayal has done, how do I know it won't happen again?

I'm assuming its just normal stuff that all LBS's have to deal with, but it sure would be nice if I'd get some understanding and some help with what I'm dealing with.

Ok, I'll stop complaining. I'm sure there are a 1000 people on this board that would kill to be were we are, but it still doesn't make it any easier.

Ok, need to run. W and I are going on a date tonight. I've offered to give her a massage tonight and she told me she'd let me know if she was in the mood or not. Here's to hoping she is as we all know where those massages lead to!

Talk to ya soon.