It's too hard sometimes

[TooLateForMe]

Any tips on "letting go?"

It's hard when every aspect of my life has a short-line connection to the R.

One thing I do get is that the best-friends aspect of our relationship can't exist without reconciliation. Do I tell W this? If she wants to pursue the friendship aspect then I would suspect there's hope there. I just don't want to be her emotional dumping ground while she moves on. How can I let go if that's the case?

And how much to I communicate that I'm letting go? Obviously not much verbally. I don't want her assuming I'm totally cold to any connection, either.

Clearly she values our connection. We're talking. A problem of mine is my unwillingness to be flexible. Her seeing me as cold and indifferent would likely convince her that I'm not changing. Shutting her out would be bad.

Should I let her take the lead in terms of communication? That seems weak, though. My taking the lead seems pushy.

Maybe set up specific days to talk? That worked during our previous separation.

I need a stronger approach, not mean, but not weak, either. I need to quit focusing on W/R. I have tools to fix the M if I have a chance so I need to let that go. I need to detach without forgetting my true goal: save our M.