Divorced and want to reconcile...

[dday101798]

Sorry, guess you mis-read me, our 'family dinner' has still never materialized, "OM would be furious". But none the less, I still extend the offer, can't say it wasn't there ya know.

We haven't sat down as a 'family' since August last year, again at my suggestion, at "our house", it was ok then but apparently not now.

I wouldn't completely back off as previously suggested, but merely acknowledge your presence, and casually extend the offer from time to time. Who knows, maybe one day your son may encourage him along as well. But I certainly wouldn't 'ram it down your X's throat' either.

Gifts, all depends. My X and I certainly are not on the level. We haven't acknowledged b-days or any holidays since the passing of our 10th anniversary last October. I have in my own way, helped the boys bake stuff or cook her something, but that's it. I did however buy her this James Dean picture (whom she adores) that I just could not pass up when buying the boys some school supplies. Suffice it to say, at the time, we were getting along and she was actualy blown away when I gave it to her. You might want to try the same approach? Just a glancing, "hey, I was in the store and saw this and I thought you'd like it is all".

I guess through it all, you do have remember, you have put the guy through a bit, granting his own shortfalls, but none the less.