How long will you and the fam be at Disney? My intuition tells me that you will have some interesting new developments to report afterward.......However, I will give you the advice that you gave me before my birthday "date" dinner.
Originally Posted By: givingitmyall
Please have a great time, but do not have any expectations...none. What your (W) does/says is something over which you have no control. Just be in the moment, have fun and see where it goes.
I'm envious! Does anyone have some kids I could rent to take to Disney World?
Thanks guys. It helps to hear that. I haven't been able to post much the last day or two b/c it's been crazy busy at work.
Quick update. D6's birthday today. BIG day for the princess. She had a great time. Cupcakes at her school with me and W there, then dinner with friends at our house. Cute story - S9 made a "Happy Birthday" poster for D and we taped it to the back of one of the bar chairs. That became the "birthday chair." When the W of the couple that joined us tonight for dinner unwittingly sat in the "birthday chair," D6 (who is not shy on personality or courage) asked her "Um, is it YOUR birthday today?" "No." "Then, why are you sitting in the birthday chair?" Too funny.
Good day. W seems to continue to make a point to talk to me, check on how my day is going, and to ask me questions when we are together. Tonight, when I got home, I was feeling pretty awful (got a nasty head cold) and had to have looked bad, W asked "What's wrong?" This is the first time she has asked me that since the bomb. I explained I was feeling pretty rough.
Oh, and another maybe kinda big thing. Tonight, I held her hand during the blessing, and when the blessing was over, I sensed her holding firmer to my hand - almost a slight squeeze. Little thing maybe.
Tonight, I held her hand during the blessing, and when the blessing was over, I sensed her holding firmer to my hand - almost a slight squeeze. Little thing maybe.
Praying together is intimate. When she sees, hears, and feels you doing this together it is sensual. Plus you have the smells and tastes of dinner together. When you can do things as a couple that tie together our senses, brains,hearts and soul it's powerful. I would pray out loud for you, the kids, her and your family together. Let her in that room. Let the kids chime in with their prayer requests too. You leading the family spiritually is gold.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
If you can find a point to agree on, restate it and state that you agree.
If she states something that you can't agree with, then say "I understand that you are saying .....(repeat what she says)...." Think for a minute on how if what she is saying, how she would feel, then add "I can see how that would make you feel".
The point is to really listen.
Don't get defensive.
Don't take it personally.
Don't correct or argue.
Last edited by Thinker; 10/08/0906:16 PM.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
Good on ya. Keep it up.