Thank you SO VERY much for your generosity in sharing. It really DOES help to give us LeftBehinders about as much peace as we may be able to get since our WalkAways are not able to offer explanations to us. I had a session with Jody this morning (I've been working with her for 11 months now). She said that your explanation for BF's resistance to coming back was spot on in my situation.
Originally Posted By: AliSuddenly
he basically said his depression made him unable to ....... care, that he was very self destructive. But even with all that, he knew deep down he still loved me and although he missed me terribly, he couldnt face coming back because of the effort it would take to fix it.
Jody confirmed that my H is depressed and in MLC mode. His resistance to reconsidering has seemed very odd since we began to reconnect last February because with his actions it seems very clear that he still has special feelings ---- yes, even loving feelings--- for me.
I know you've posted this info before somewhere, but given the additional processing you have done with BF recently, would you please restate what thing(s) were most instrumental in moving him to summon the energy to risk coming back to you, even in his depressed state?
Jody suggested writing a letter to H to give to him 2 weeks before our D-day to ask if he would consider delaying the date. As I craft this letter I would like to post and ask for feedback on this site.
Thanks! Even though I've never met any of you, I want you to know how much your kindness means to me.
