Hope and heartache

[billclay18]

We've been splitting weekends and they stay at my house every Wednesday night. This week, for the second time since I moved into my apartment, she asked if I could take them Thursday as well so she could catch up at work. I don't have any special plans on Thursday so I said yes.

Because my job is flexible I'm the one who goes home every day to see the kids get off the bus. When the after-school sitter gets there I head back to work.

I added it up in my head. The girls will stay at my apartment over night at least 135 days a year -- including summer vacations -- and with the after-school stuff, I'll see them at least 280.

That's pretty good.

Yes it is, better than 50% of the time. Why have the custody agreement state otherwise?

We agreed early on that the girls would stay together and my W would be the primary home. Her self worth is really tied into the girls.

Too bad...the primary home should be the the home the kids spend the most time at.

She feels her job detracts from her ability to be a good mother. I could fight -- and people have told me I should -- for custody, but I feel that would be counterproductive. Fights like that cause long-term divisions and kids usually get caught in the middle.

Not necessarily. You already have a working arrangement with the kids. Why shouldn't the paperwork reflect that arrangement?