THanks so much BJ. Yes, I brought up depression and he immediately rejected the idea that this is depression. He is only aware of what he terms "anxiety." Even that he is aware of it is a step.
I agree it could be depression. He is quite isolated and with our separation he must be feeling awful.
I'm just finally getting atiny view into what's behind all the rage.
We start MC in a month or so, so it could be a time to bring it up.
you're exactly right when you say he has no idea of his tone or his yelling. Hard for me to believe, but he constently denies he is yelling. I think he honestly doesn't recognize it as he is cought up in whatever pressure he is under.
It's a vicious cycle - he is stressed b/c we have marital problems and he left - we are having marital problems and he's staying away because he's stressed. Ugh.
And yes, he works more to gain control. He is definitely trying to gain control in all areas. It def. signifies pain inside him - I just hope in MC he will finally open up a little to me and we can deal with what's inside.
Thanks for the perspective, it really helps. I'm opposite - I'm laid back, artistic, flexible - and I have no bones about talking about when I'm depressed. And I go and get help when I feel depressed. H holds it all in. I worry about him.
