I'm in a similar sitch to yours, but I think you have to move on before you file, if that makes any sense. What I mean is when you get to the point where it really doesn't matter to you, when you've completely let go knowing you are fine either way, then you file. If you aren't there, filing won't help. D is tough, trust me, but tougher when you're still emotionally invested because it's difficult to separate the emotional aspect from the business side of it, but that's what lawyers are for.
Hope that made sense.
Me45 (D11 from 1st marriage) W43 (D20 & D16 from 1st marriage) M4 Bomb 6/16/09 W wants D W moved out 8/29/09 I sent her D paperwork 9/25/09...I'm done