Listen to Mach and Cat......you are still focused on her and not you. You think that you can fix the situation quickly by trying to be nice and helping out....WRONG. You are sweating the truly small stuff to much. Let it go and focus on you.
I am going to list some irony's of your situation that may have happened or will;
You spend time with kids-She complains that you are doing it now to save marriage and resents you for not doing it the past
You don't spend time with kids-She thinks you are a deadbeat parent
You help fixing things in house-She thinks "You didn't help out before and are trying to save the marriage" and worse yet...she didn't ask
You don't help fix things-She complains that you are the same old person who never helped out.
Bring car over to house while new one is in garage-She didn't ask for it...you are being nice to save the marriage..resentful for you being open to her needs when in her mind you weren't before
Not bringing car to over-Resentful for you having car that you don't lend her
AYK.....I can on and on with this situations you will face that there is no win for you what so ever...and the list is very long. Anything nice you do will be viewed in one of two ways A) You are trying to save a marriage she doesn't want B)She resents you for being nice now that she doesn't want you anymore when in her mind you were never like that in the past. Remember what you think doesn't matter to her....it is what she thinks that counts. You could be built like Vin Diesel, have George Clooney's smile, and Brad Pitts hair....but if she thinks you are fat, have bad teeth, and are bald....that is what you are in her mind. That is just how it is. You can only control yourself...only answer to yourself....only improve yourself. Through those fixes she MIGHT see you again as how you are and not as how you were in the past.
