I was brief before, but didn't want to come across as sounding like I knew all the answers or have read all the books. 7 years does give you a lot of time for reflection and review.
I don't know her love sign so worth a look, but frankly am wearing out on the reading front and spent 2 yrs in prodcutive counseling myself. Now seems like I can analyze the situation or someone else's but too afraid to act or too beaten down from trying. She's just checked out and takes every oppty to blame me for anything. I can say anything ans she misreads it as negative, critical, demeaning, etc. The kids see it and comment on it to me. We live in separate rooms and beds for 6 years. Now she doesnt even say good night, good bye, or acknowledge me other than to criticize. Now kids claim that "mom looks for any excuse to leave the house." She finally wants to pull the plug because my 14yr olds son cries when he sees the arguments - almost always after she comes home from drinking nights out. I am not tea toter nor does she have problem there but these nights out are really escapes and often in the company of bad influences. She loosens up the emotions on these nights and the anger comes out.
I want to do what best for the kids but also afraid of the example we are giving them. Because I am male and where I live, I have been told I wont get custody. And to battle for more than some form of joint wiould be ugly and likely a losing battle as well. I truly beliive that I am the one providing the emotional support to them and I feel crippled with trying to stay in the marriage when she wont work on it. But deep down, i still love her but am not gettign what i need in the mariage. How can i even bring her to the table? or am I better off letting it go? what about the kids? me?
