Hope and heartache

[ClingingToHope]

W just called again. Just routine stuff about her work week, her schedule, how I can best help her. No pleasantries at all. I have surgery in two weeks and she still hasn't asked for what.

I wonder if she even remembers are one good talk now five weeks ago where we agreed to talk once a week on the R? I honestly can't imagine now how we'll ever break through this emotional wall.

It just sounds as if there's nothing there. I really don't want to talk to her or see her any more. I'd rather remember the times from years ago.

Now, I'm regretting my decision to sign up D10 for swimming. That means two times a week I'll have to see her when I pickup and drop off D10 from practice as well as having to coordinate some swim meets.

If you took those out of the equation, I would only have to see her maybe once every two weeks.