Puppy, You just put into the most eloquent words where I am right now.
W has until tomorrow night to get me back our dissolution agreement before I file for D. I have also truly let her go, and interestingly enough, it was the exact same realization - why in the world did I think I needed to control/handle the situation, sort of a "duh" moment.
Belle - I'm at a point in my life where I'm actually filing a D - when I've fought for 3 years to avoid it. But I'm filing because I see bitterness in my kids - they need closure. I am happy and well-adjusted, but when the kids and I try to move forward, my W drags me back down.
We need freedom, the kids and I need closure. It hurts, I hate it more than anything, but sometimes it is the right thing.
It is your H's choice now. If he wants you, he'll be willing to make REAL clear changes, you deserve that, and I would not settle for less, or else everything will always be the same.
Hand him over to God, grieve, cry your tears, and then look up!
