Newcomer, want to keep my hope alive!

[iwantittowork]

Detaching is the key GIMA, I know. I don't know how to fully detach yet, maybe seperation will do it.

I went against the rules, and talked to W about where she is at, not to make her feel guilty, or temperature take, but to try and assess what I need to do next.

So many things she says are mirrored still by others.

She's the bad person for leaving, she is better off alone, she is happier just being by herself and confident in her decision.

I need help from you guys on the Tough Love approach, I have mediation tomorrow, and I have been thinking about it, and don't know where to hold my line.

Where do I budge, and where do I hold firm?

Example, the other day she said because her work doesn't provide health insurance, she wants in the D agreement that I keep her on my health insurance.

My thoughts are, she wants the benefits of being married to me, without being married to me. I want to hold the line and say no, if you want a D, then get your own health insurance, maybe at most a small time or year on mine, then get your own.

My issues is, I don't know if that sounds fair or is me just being spiteful?

Where else should I be firm and strong during negotiation?

Please list out anything if you have been through this before, I don't want to get taken advantage of by feeling I need to support her for my d8's sake.

Mortgage? If I move out, I want her to pay the mortgage and bills until the house is sold.

Child support? Nothing I can do here, that I know of.

Alimony? I absolutely don't want to pay any.