I agree with Floyd - I would tell your mother to hold off on the questions for awhile. It will put your H on the defensive and just polarize things even more.
Your H is not ready to tell his family yet - so his mind is clearly not made up yet. He is trying to come home early - that is inconsistent with his stated desire to leave.
Part of his issue was working too much and not spending enough time with the kids. On the eve of his moving out - he is coming home early...
I know that the few times The X and I really had a bad fight - I would stay at work late - not come home early!
Give your H all the space he needs to think on his own. Try to not do anything or allow anyone else to do anything that will give him a reason to shift his focus from what he is doing to another crisis. Do not give hand him an excuse to use as justification for leaving.
Many people including myself often use anger or other emotions to hide or shift our focus from the real issues that are bothering us.
I know it isn't easy for you to be in limboland - you are probably at your wits end. Try to find a diversion for yourself and pull out every PMA booster you can find. I think it is very important to maintain a very calm, not necessarily happy facade the next few weeks. Happy may not be good - I think he needs to feel needed. These are the last memories he will have to ponder and hopefully miss when he is sitting all by himself in his new place. With no reason to come home early...
