I also had a bad experience with my pastor. Actually more like a no experience (tried to go talk to him in the wake of the bomb and was told he'd have time for me IN THREE WEEKS). Turned me off my parish for the time being.
Why don't you contact the Retrouvaille people in your area (you can e-mail them through their web site) and ask for a referral to a pastor? You can keep going to your regular church for your kids and get your own spiritual counselor through any other parish or congregation.
As to the kids. They do say the darnest things. My D4 once told me very seriously: 'Mom, you are going to have to marry Dad again, so that I can have a little brother'
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
