I totally agree that boundaries need to be set and enforced. There a lot of things she does do that made many boundaries easy. She hasn't brought any of her relationships into the house other than the first one. I think the only reason for that was there had been a friendship between the GF, myself, and all of our kids prior to the crud hitting the fan. She also doesn't spend house money on her forays...she's just using money she earns from a part time gig she has from home. Luckily for me a lot of the horrible things I have witnessed on the board have never happened here.
The going out is for me. Financially irresponsible...yes! I do agree. I just feel trapped a lot. I work my two business from the house and of course I am here when the kids are. I do get out for work every know and then and of course there are the kids activities, but those aren't nice relaxing times for me. So I take the kids and try to get out and do something...that all three of us can do. It is a tough one for me....one I usually feel guilty about making. At times though it feels like the walls are closing on me and suffocating me...usually I relieve that by working out. It is an action I will have to monitor.
You are correct that there isn't any family nearby. I have developed some good family friendship which has been a godsend. To actually take that a step farther I have signed up to help my daughters teacher throughout the school....I am nervous about it, but hopefully I can make some new friends and at the same time be a positive impact on my daughter's school year.
Today is a busy day for. I also had a bad nights sleep (wife was tossing and turning and on top of that...300 situps yesterday threw my back into spasms last night...ouch). So I was up at five and worked for a few hours. From there made a big breakfast for everybody and then off to the soccer fields (the team I coach won...yippee) for this mornings game. Shortly I am off to the grocery store to get that part of the day done...one thing I will say...being basically a single parent is tough. My hats goes off to all the parents who do it for 15-20 years!
Also had a good day as of recent with the business...Landed a job yesterday and also discussed the potential of a few more with a couple of clients. The jobs still aren't in the basket, but at least there is discussion about the possibility of some.
The wife was mellow this morning. Her ex-gf is trying to help her find an apartment. Of course the ex-gf doesn't hear my wife's repeated statements that she doesn't have any money. The ex-gf is basically enabling my wifes thoughts that all her problems are here in the house and that she needs to run away and restart her live. I really hope the ex-gf is there for my wife when she realizes what she has given up. I know that realization will happen, it is just a matter of when and if I decide to stay around that long.
Have a great day...I will catch up with you later!
