Leaving the Land of Insanity...

[mishka422]

I apologize ahead of time for a longish look at my feelings...

NEVER, EVER APOLOGIZE FOR EPRESSING YOUR FEELINGS!

You know we understand them, have been there, are there, feel your hurt and confusion, and sympathize.

I need to be honest enough with myself to admit that I am not really 'detached' enough to spend this much time with Dan.

Bingo. You are a smart cookie and already have identified one of the sources of your mixed feelings.

Therapy? Yes. Do it. It will be good for you to get that outside opinion and assistance. It will help you grow your new BBJ into a more independent thinker. Stopping your thoughts when planning things from being about 'us' to being about 'me' is really hard.

I agree with Sandy about the kids being confused by the situation. If they were older, it wouldn't be such an issue. They are just too young to separate a friendship between their parents from the M relationship they have always seen. Do them and yourself a huge favor and stop the family outings with Dan for at least a few months.

Of course, school events, meetings, sports events, etc. you should both be present, just not for the extras. Dinner out, movies, trips into the city, etc.....no.

Find a good Christian counselor and go BBJ. You will sort out your feelings a lot faster and better that way. It only took me 1.5 years to admit that and break down and pay the darned cash for the help I needed.