Thanks. I know he is in pain. I try and remember that. My best friend's theory was that I don't let him know that I need him, he doesn't feel needed around here. I thought I'd go out on a limb and tell him that and ask him to come to Disney with us.
Me email to him:
wish you would reconsider your decision on Disney. I really need your help on this trip. I don't know how I'm going to manage the airport alone with sleepy children, car seats and needing a rental car. Plus, I'm nervous about driving alone late at night in a city I don't know. I also don't like the idea of Jack sitting alone in a row on the airplane. This is a whole different magnitude of traveling with them.
I wish you would come. It is considerably more fun when you are with us. There are many rides that each child needs an adult partner. I need you to be with us! I want you to be with us. We don't have to do Universal Studios, that was just a thought I was throwing out.
Love,
Me
His response:
I understand. This is a hard conversation to have over e-mail, but we never seem to talk otherwise.
You must have expected this otherwise you would not have planned to do Universal to "start a new tradition" as you put it. At some point, we will both need to do this alone with children. Jack is old enough where he can step-up and at least carry a car seat. Plus, if you take a roller suitcase, you can balance an extra car seat or carry-on bag on top of it. Remember how well the kids did going to California with their own suitcases?
For as many times as you've been to Orlando, you should be somewhat familiar with the road system. I think you're going to be surprised by how easy getting around will be.
At some point we each need to get on with our own separate lives. I'm having a harder and harder time pretending that everything's OK between us or that tomorrow I'll wake up and be the "old Ken". For the kids' sake, I'm trying real hard to keep that from them until we have "the conversation".
Thank you for the card this morning. I could tell that it came from the heart.
Me.
Am I just being a fool holding out hope? Trying to repair this? He just wants to be gone. Was I too pathetic asking him to come? I hate doubting myself so much.
