Same holds true if one or the other of us had been stay at home parent. That doesn't mean that person is or should be custodial parent.
RSF, what you want is for the kids to have stability and as little upheaval as possible. Parenting is not about quantity it is about quality. If one parent has been a stay at home parent and a good one, that must be considered.
My kids love being with their dad but they struggle with the mere two nights a week away from me because I have been there making them dinner, getting them to bed every night since they were born. Yes, it makes him feel better to be alone with them and to be the "awesome" dad he is but they are really torn. And, more time with him would exacerbate that. The poor kids are in the middle. All facets must be considered. This is not about us parents dividing the kids "evenly" like property. It actually makes me sick that people think you can even do that. It is about giving these kids some semblance of a stable and predictable childhood.
